Notes on Death

Sometimes death is permanent. Sometimes it's not. Usually it comes down to internal functions, the way the system works, etc. Generally people with DID can have headmates die and then come back. It's fine, that happens, and the grief is still real. But for some people, they don't.

General todo

• Consider how each section should be organised; like, should death withotu knowledge be at the top? Or in the middle? etc;
• Actually write the damnable things
• Once written, look through for biases and perspective blindness: try to consider things about trauma, non-spiritual system functions
• Consider writing stuff about what to do if you're very new to plurality and need help with inner death
• Things we can't touch on that need touching on: outer religion overlapping with this; inner suicide; inner traumatic injury, hospitals, medical care (should the first and third be other articles?); explaining to littles or headmates who can't understand

How to know when someone died?

• Inter-wiki links on communication
• Comment on visualisation techniques? Headspace stuff in general; also get interwiki links
• Comment on dormancy and integration; more links! But also maybe talk about internal experiences / differences? Senses?
• If there's no difference, it's up to you. Talk about what to do when you genuinely can't tell between death, dormancy, and quietness; inter-wiki links on making decisions together
• Memory of death is not the same as death: trauma, flashbacks, impacts of trauma on inner functions

What to do when (you learn that) someone has died?

• Funerary processes, death rites; inner and outer culture; suggestions on some processes that have less to do with headspace (i.e stuff other than 'bury them')
• Grieving: exo-wiki links but also stuff about how to grieve when you're not out, actual methods of grieving (candles, journalling? Go back through the post we made I guess)
• Informing other members, informing outsiders close to the deceased: suggestions on what to say, how to say it. Talk about that 'circle of support' concept where you (as, most likely, the one closest to the deceased) shouldn't be giving support to those less close / less affected
• Remembrance, celebration of life (suggestions on things that can be done)
• Supporting headmates who take on the role of undertaker or funeral manager; talk about emotional distress that can occur (like how Three feels responsible for the amount of death we experience), general advice on how to support, inner-wiki links
• Death without knowledge: discovering the deceased after their passing. Refer back to other sections on what to do about their death but also cover how to cope with senses of guilt, self-blame for not knowing they died, emphasise it's not the readers fault

What to do before someone dies?

• Preventative measures; understanding death, avoiding it. Mostly involves understanding of internal functions or mechanisms, refer to other wiki pages?
• Avoidance of not knowing death; roll calls, communication rules that make the difference between death and noncommunicativeness clearer, buddy systems, how to check on headmates who are naturally quiet
• Preparation for funerary processes and death rites; understand what you'll be doing before you do it, who will do what
• Inter-wiki and exo-wiki links on general crisis management, distress scales, etc
• End of life care: what to do when someone is dying, but not dead yet. Suggestions on what to do, how to do it, how to help a headmate decide when they're in such a position. Talk about merging / integration, changing identity, assisted death
• Exo-wiki links; wills, inner and outer personal belongings, relatives and dependents of the deceased

What to do if they come back?